Anxiety, Kids Mental Health, Parenting, Self-Care, Uncategorized

Cleaning Out Our Emotional Backpacks

Have you ever let your kid’s backpack go too long without being cleaned out? It’s like the creature from the black lagoon’s habitat in there! There’s no telling what you may find but you can be pretty sure it will be horrifying.

Kids also need to clean out there emotional backpacks on the regular!

I got caught talking so my teacher wrote my name on the board.
So I stuff embarrassment, anger and injustice (because my friend started the conversation) into my emotional backpack.

I finally figured out that math concept I’ve been faking that I understood for days but couldn’t celebrate because I wanted everyone (including my teacher) to think I already got it.
So I stuff frustration, deferred pride & self-hatred into my emotional backpack.

My best friends were pulled for a special project and I wasn’t so I had to hustle all of recess to find new kids to play with.
So I stuff sadness, loneliness and feelings of inferiority into my emotional backpack.

Some kids like to verbally unpack their emotional backpacks and a feelings chart can be helpful. You can ask which of these feelings did you feel today? Encourage them to list more than one and then say, “It was important enough for you to carry (enter their feeling word here) with you all day & you brought them home. What do they want to say?”

Some kids like to creatively unpack their emotional backpacks. Encourage them to build paint or journal their feelings. A prompt that might help would be, “It sounds like you felt really proud of yourself today but you didn’t get to shine. Can you show me that shine with your markers & glitter or magnet tiles.”
PSA: Playdough is great for cleaning up glitter

Some kids like to physically clean out their emotional backpacks. You can offer the opportunity to write out difficult feelings and tape them to a punching bag, trampoline or bury them in the back yard.

Cleaning out our emotional backpacks should help mitigate meltdowns, sibling squabbles and rigidity after school.
Parents might want to try cleaning out their emotional work bags too!

Depression, Kids Mental Health, Parenting, Trauma

When parents bring their kids to therapy it’s usually for these reasons:

We support families in East Dallas in all sorts of ways.

Kids sometimes need someone to talk to other than their parents. And parents need a sounding board, a support person in helping their kids be a success. We like to bring families more peace in their homes. We help you focus your parenting strategy and build consistency and security in your family.

Here are some reasons families come to us for counseling:

Parent coaching
A child has a mental health diagnosis: ADD, ADHD, Spectrum Disorders, Sensory Processing Disorder, Anxiety, Depression, PTSD
A child is differently abled and needs help coping with big feelings
A family is grieving a loss or a recent trauma
A child needs help being assertive
A child needs learn to calm down anger outbursts or other big emotions

Kate Miller, LPC is our family therapist and can meet your kid where they’re at and give them the tools they need to succeed. Read more about her here.

Anxiety, Kids Mental Health

What does kid’s anxiety look like?

Parents, I know back to school is a stressful time for everyone. ESPECIALLY right now, we’re all facing fears and changes that aren’t easy.

When your kid isn’t coping very well- it can be tough to figure out what’s going on.

Is it anxiety?
Is it just worry?
Is it rebellion?

We want to clarify what anxiety looks like in kids. Anxiety in kids looks different than it does in adults. Our in house child therapist, Kate Miller, explains the difference…

Anxiety can look like hyperactivity

Anxiety in kids (especially young kids) can look like the inability to be still (in ways that are usually normal for them) and the inability to focus. This can sometimes be identified as ADD or ADHD when it is really anxiety.

Anxiety can look like regression.

Anxiety in kids can look like regression in development, which can be, having accidents after being consistently potty trained, returning to baby talk or renewed separation anxiety.

Anxiety can look like becoming withdrawn or frozen.

Anxiety in kids can look like a lack of interest in the things that they used to be important to them. This can be school, sports or friendships.

So what can you do about it?

It’s important to try to identify what’s going on with your kid. Sometimes we see the “negative” behaviors our kids have and think it’s an attitude problem or something that needs to be corrected. But if you see these more specific behaviors, it may be anxiety. As a parent when your kid is anxious what they need most is someone to listen- even to the irrational fears. “My teacher hates me” or “I’m never going back to school!” They can try to release that tension in irrational ways- but if we can respond with compassion first, they will feel heard. When a kid feels heard, it’s much easier for them to calm down. Once they’re calm, you can talk about how to express their emotions differently, you can bring in consequences (it’s ok to feel anxious about going back to school, but it’s not ok to refuse to get in the car in the morning).

One more thing to remember: when you’re dealing with your kid’s mental health, always reach out for more help! Ask the school counselor or talk to a family therapist.